Female masturbation has been banned from the overall human sexual experience and
conversation about sex and only been brought on the table in the 60s and 70s, thanks to the revolutionary sex educator Betty Dodson.
Before that, women’s sexuality was considered inexistent, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise
that female masturbation is still a big taboo.
Women don’t masturbate. They don’t need to. It’s wrong and immoral. It’s abnormal!
There are many myths surrounding female masturbation, mostly kept alive by fear, guilt, and
shame. None of them has been proved right by any medical or scientific fact.
Some of these myths apply to anyone with a vagina, and some apply to anyone who identifies as a woman. We reckon that this article mostly focuses on cis women. We hope we’ll soon be able to integrate our knowledge and experience to also discuss myths surrounding trans people and other non-cis women’s masturbation habits.
Now, let’s debunk some nasty myths, shall we?!
1. Women don’t masturbate
Men masturbate. It’s a fact, an innate instinct, a normal thing men do. Women simply don’t.
There’s no doubt that women’s sexuality has been repressed, but women do masturbate! According to the Gossard Big M Survey, around 92% of women aged 18-30 masturbate
Self-pleasure is a natural, innate instinct for both males and females of our species.
2. Men need to masturbate; women don’t
Men need to masturbate, or their balls will turn blue. Men have a strong biological need to masturbate because it helps them blow off steam and calm their impulses. Women are less sexual; hence they don’t have the same drive and need for sexual satisfaction.
There’s no scientific proof of that at all. This is just a man-centered bias, based on the belief that women’s libido is intrinsically lower than men’s and that women’s sexuality only exists to satisfy other people (men)’s needs.
3. Only single or dissatisfied women masturbate
Masturbation replaces partnered sex, and women may indulge in it only if they’re single or
dissatisfied with their relationship.
Self-pleasure has nothing to do with your relationship status. It’s a need and a great way to explore your sexuality, learn how your body works, what you like and how you like it.
If you’re in a relationship and feel the urge to masturbating, it doesn’t mean that you aren’t satisfied with your partner. And you don’t need to feel miserable about your sexual life, in general, to desire to masturbate.
4. Masturbation is unhealthy
Masturbation can make you infertile, cause blindness, and numb you.
Masturbation isn’t unhealthy and doesn’t have any side effects. On the contrary, self-pleasure can boost your mood and immunity and reduce stress, thanks to the release of feel-good hormones during the orgasm. It can even strengthen pelvic muscles and reduce the chances of infections!
5. Masturbation can ruin partnered sex
If you find masturbation pleasurable, it’ll be harder for you to enjoy partnered sex and achieve orgasm.
As said before, masturbation is a great way to explore your body and desires. If you’re more
attuned with what you like, you can communicate better with your partner and improve your sexual life.
6. Using sex toys can cause nerve damage
Strong vibrations can affect the clitoris’ nervous system and cause desensitization or even nerve damage. That’s why women shouldn’t use sex toys for their self-pleasure.
That’s again an assumption. There’s no scientific evidence that using a vibrator will damage
your nerves. You might experience temporary numbness and become accustomed to repetition.
This could, in some cases, make it difficult to hit your orgasm through other types of simulations. But there’s a simple solution: just include different techniques, stimulations, and toys to your pleasure routine.
7. Masturbation equals cheating
If you masturbate, you’re disloyal to your partner.
This myth might be born of shame, insecurity, or guilt. Masturbation is not cheating. It’s a need and a self-exploration. It’s a normal expression of human sexuality and has nothing to do with partnered sex.
8. Young girls should not masturbate
Masturbation is bad and unhealthy for young people, especially girls because it encourages promiscuity.
This is probably the most common myth around masturbation. Many young girls are shamed and guilted into avoiding masturbation for fear of being considered ‘bad girls.’
Masturbation is safe for people of any age, gender, and sexual orientation. It’s also extremely important for young girls, as it teaches them to be good with their bodies, to feel in control of their urges and needs. It can make them feel more empowered and safe in their skin.
9. Only sluts masturbate
Women who masturbate are promiscuous.
Masturbation isn’t wrong or shameful. Women are allowed to give themselves pleasure when and how they want. This doesn’t mean they’re kinky or sexually adventurous.
Women who indulge in self-pleasure don’t necessarily love sex or do so to tantalize men. Masturbation is a basic human instinct and a private act.
10. Women’s masturbation is more emotional
Ok, women may masturbate, but they don’t do it like men do. They’re more emotional and
When we say that female masturbation is normal, we mean that there’s no difference between men and women in the way they experience it. Like men, women act quickly upon their fantasies and satisfy their urges through masturbation. As simple as that.
However, female masturbation is often depicted in movies and literature as a sensual, erotic thing. Women are not just responding to a desire; they’re evoking it. This is clearly another man-centered belief or maybe a fantasy in itself. Still, it can harm women’s sexuality, as it may lead women to become overly self conscious about how they look, sound, and move even when their only intent is to give pleasure to themselves.
11. Women don’t enjoy watching porn when masturbating
Men are more visual and have a higher sexual drive, so they enjoy watching porn. While women only think about sex in its most emotional form.
Well, women also are visual, and they enjoy sex in any form! According to What Do Women Want: Adventures in the Science of Female Desire by Daniel Bergner, one in three porn users is a woman, women’s eyes linger on erotic imagery as much as men’s do, and their vaginas become lubricated when watching all kinds of sex videos.
Even though many women like porn, most of it is created for heterosexual men’s pleasure only. But things are slowly changing, as the demand for feminist or even women-centered porn is on the rise.
12. It’s unhealthy to masturbate during periods
Women should not masturbate when they’re menstruating, as it will impact their cycle.
There’s no proof to support this belief. On the contrary, orgasm is a natural way to relax vaginal muscles and relieve menstrual cramps.
13. Women need sex toys to masturbate
Only sex toys can stimulate women’s centers of pleasure the right way.
Nothing against sex toys – great invention! But women can and do get themselves off without any external aid.
14. Masturbation can change the shape and look of the vagina and vulva
Masturbation will change the shape of your vagina and vulva and make them look less attractive.
Our bodies can’t be permanently changed because of masturbation or sex. That’s a fact. Vulvas and vaginas come in many different shapes and sizes, and we encourage you to celebrate them as they are. They have been shamed enough for how they look and feel; it’s time to show them some love!
15. There’s only one way to masturbate for women
Rubbing or fingering – there’s no other way for women to experience self-pleasure.
Women masturbate in different ways because their bodies are and feel different. Whether t is by rubbing your vulva or inserting fingers into your vagina, or using sex toys, there’s only one rule: your pleasure – your choice!
There are a lot of positive reasons to masturbate. Some masturbate because it helps them sleep better, others because it helps relieve stress. Some use it as a way to explore their body; others only respond to their basic needs and urges.
Whatever your reason is, we hope our myth debunking session helped you realize that masturbation is not wrong, shameful, or immoral. It’s a natural part of being a healthy, sexual
At Fusion Movement, we want to help all women to take their pleasure into their hands, explore it and own it. We want women to feel empowered by their overflowing sexuality and to achieve full sexual autonomy.
“A real orgasm is something that no matter where it comes from, a woman takes for herself,” Betty Dodson said. So, whether it comes from masturbation, one or more partners, just take it and ride it without fear or guilt!